Feeling blue? Down in the dumps? Feel like slitting your wrists would be a vacation? Feeling like you wanna drown me in a bucket of my own tears after reading that last post? Never you fear, a cure is here! For the ladies at least… and some of you guys out there whose thoughts are more than appreciative when it comes to the male form. What I wouldn’t kill for some strawberries and whipped cream while I was looking up all these super fine guys. Most fun I had in weeks. And the stress just melts away as you see all these guys without their shirts on. What’s better than that than a guy in a nice suit or reading? Don’t you just love it when a man reads? So here’s a gift from me to you as an apology of how depressing I am and I’m probably gunna keep being. I figured I might as well Jenna my blog and write like no one’s reading. Which they aren’t. But if you can’t read then you might as well look at all the pretty pictures. *SIGH* Try not to molest your computer screen and I will try not to melt in a giant puddle of drool before I finish this post. Boy, don’t you just looove the internet?
No particular order, but here’s a short list of men I would never kick outta my bed:
1. GEORGE CLOONEY
An oldie but most certainly goodie. Hands down George Clooney is the universal crush and heart breaker of woman all around the world. He was def one the first older guys I found really attractive. No matter how much older or grayer, he is just amazingly sexy. He has a great voice, a face that would make you swoon, all he has to do is give you a look and tell you something in that rolling rumble of a voice, and it’s over. Now why can’t all older guys look like this? If they did I would sooo get me a sugar daddy. Keep it up, Clooney. We just can’t get enough.
2. ROBERT DOWNEY JR.
Now this guy is my favorite type of wine. I looove him so much more now that he’s older. I remember him in Only You with Marisa Tomei, and I thought, this is the guy she’s supposed to fall in love with? I did not find him attractive at alllll. But now, that he’s older, more defined, and has that sexy facial hair, and just sexy hair to begin with, I’m in love forever. I love him in the Iron Man movies and think he’s such a great actor and a jokester. He seems to be the one to totally make you laugh with that serious face of his, and that sexy semi spiked hair cut. He’s one guy where I prefer him older. Don’t pop that cork just yet, it might get better than you imagined. I wouldn’t be mad if he was handcuffed to my bed.
3. RYAN REYNOLDS
OMG well… There was certainly no shortage of this guy half naked, and I’m soo not mad at that. I wouldn’t want him to have his shirt on half the time, well all the time, either. I fell in love with him on Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place. He was always that type of funny guy and goodness gracious is this package over complete. He’s funny, beyond cute, has a body that would make any level headed swoon, and a v-cut that makes a girl wanna rip his pants off. Better start the restraining order… he’s gunna need it.
4. BRAD PITT
I first fell in love with this guy when I saw a rerun of Meet Joe Black on tv. I was in love with this character and his voice and just everything. He really is something and that’s when I realized, this is what people are talking about. I had no clue who Brad Pitt was and I totally got it after that movie. He def raised my awareness of how beautiful men could be in middle school. I really couldn’t watch tv and stuff and I never knew who people were talking about and finally I did and I was just like man oh man was I missing out on some godlike creatures out there. Now I knew why everyone and their grandmother where so in love with this guy. Then I finally watched FIght Club in college, (yes I know, but remember super sheltered life), and I really appreciated him in this role. Sure I’ve seen him in other movies and I totally looove the Ocean movies but these images I will never get outta my head. The part when he finishes fighting and he finally comes up all bloody and stuff but that v cut of his is what killed me. Just his stance and everything…. my friend had to tell me to breathe. And also this scene above when he comes out of the room after having sex and my goodness it was enough to give me asthma! Look at that v cut!!!!! *sigh**drool*
5. COLIN FARRELL
The bad boy of Hollywood and one of my crushes in high school. I loved him and I had no idea why. Besides him being the badass of the red carpet, he was the epitome of bad boys out there. But of course he cleaned up and now you can bring him home to mom. But at this point I don’t care where I get to bring him as long as he gets to go anywhere with me. I love him and that scruffy hair and has such a sexy Irish accent omg that def helps improve everything! I recently fell in love with him all over again in Ondine. Def see that movie if you want to be in love with him and never stop. He def has a humorous side and loved him in Horrible Bosses. I also loved him in Fright Night as the sexy vampire Jerry. Man, I would soo let him eat me up.
6. ALEXANDER SKARSGARD
I fell in love with this dude, hard. I don’t like him with long hair, I don’t why but I don’t. I love this look he has now with the long part slicked back, he looks totally sexy. There were def no shortage of half naked pics of this guy thanks to True Blood. Another great reason to watch the show. Omg that v cut!!!! As you can tell I’m such a sucker for those. I’m not into muscles like that but that v cut can drive a girl mad. Mad with desire. 😀 Besides him being incredibly damn gorgeous, he is terribly tall and I wanna weep at the great height of him. I’m such a sucker for tall guys and he makes me swoon with vertigo. Man what reason is there not to like him? He totally couldn’t get any sexier and I would let him take a bite outta me any day. I love on True Blood when he lost his memory and he went all Baby Eric. He was sooooooo adorable and sexy and omg I would have been in hog heaven just like Sookie was with this guy. I also appreciated this last scene with Eric reading naked in the snow. But he better be alright or else. Especially since next year will be its last season. This guy needs to be there!
7. BILL SKARSGARD
Well this is certainly one family I wouldn’t mind being apart of. Two sexy as hell, tall brothers with sexy American accents… there goes the vertigo again. As you know, I’m in love with this guy from Hemlock Grove and he is the new haunter of my dreams. He kills me on that show in how weird and crazy he can be, but then super sweet and sensitive. There’s nothing more to say because I just want this kid so bad. This is what dreams are made of… at least my dreams anyway. The only person that could give Alexander a run for him money. Are we married yet?
8. JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT
*SIGH* Been in love with this kid ever since 3rd Rock from the Sun. I loved him on that show and def watched it for him. At one point I just found some stuff he did when I started to get into movies having Netflix and getting them from the library. I fell in love with grown up Joseph over watching movies like Brick, 500 Days of Summer, and The Lookout. Plus who could forget him alongside Julia Styles and the late Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You? He has always been there in the background and now he’s really the man about Hollywood. And how could you resist sucha cute face, that humor, and talent? Especially can’t wait for Don Jon which he has written, directed, and staring in. How’s that for talent? My goodness he couldn’t get anymore sexier and can’t wait for some much needed sexy time scenes in Don Jon. Plus Scarlet’s in it. Threesome? Anybody? Anybody? No? okay…….
9. JASON SEGAL
Sure Jason’s not the most in shape guy and you won’t see him very much without his shirt on but the pics you do find don’t leave a whole lot to the imagination. And just watch Forgetting Sarah Marshall if you wanna see more of all of that. 😀 At a point I was having dreams about us being friends and then dating… and then other things. He’s a total hottie to me, and he’s tall and I just wanna hug him an squish him. And how could you not love him in Freaks and Geeks? I was like, bitch, if you don’t wanna date him, I will! Plus he’s fucking funny!!!! He just about killed me in I Love You, Man (why did no one tell me how hilarious that movie is? oh yeah I have no friends), and so happy he was the love interest in Bad Teacher, another really fucking funny movie. I love em, he’s tall, funny, squishable, made a movie with the Muppets, and just really fucking adorable. What’s not to love?
10. PAUL RUDD
Paul Rudd my not be on your list of sexy guys but he’s totally on mine. He’s been a crush of mine since Clueless, the one movie I’d watch over and over and over. Yes, I did say I was sheltered, but I would go to my grandma’s house a lot and my cousin had the movie on tape. It def was one of my favorites that’d watch every time I’d go over there. Of course all my older cousins were boys so it was whatever they wanted to watch, was what we were watching. But they introduced to me to Clueless and many other shows and movies. Anyway, Paul kind of went away from major Hollywood, but came back older, funnier, and hotter. Now he’s one of Hollywood’s favorite funny guys doing many comedies that have failed to disappoint me. Ever charming with that lopsided grin, school boy wit, and good looks, it’s hard for me to say no to this guy. Sure he’s not the fittest and maybe more lean but I looove that. It makes me just wanna squeeze the shit of a guy when he’s like that. Also, if you’re as funny and cute as this guy, you def will see me without any clothes on… that’s if you’d want to of course.
11. GAEL GARCIA BERNAL
Soooo, def in love with this guy. One guy I would not give a shit about being short. Who gives a fuck when you look like that? He is beyond beautiful. His eyes are amazing and he has these lips that curve like Cupid himself put his bow on his lips. Man he makes me swoon forever. I fell in love with him in Motorcycle Diaries and of course career stalked him. He has a mix of spanish movies and english ones. He is Mexican and a lot of his roles are done in spanish and I would read subtitles all day just to watch him lol. I loved him in the Science of Sleep, that movie made me fall in love with him haaaaard coooore. My dream guy, all weird and confused and just wanting someone to love….*sigh* But even weird guys don’t like me so I’m sure I would’ve been overlooked. But the major love I have for this guy def over extends his height, and I’m ok with that.
12. MICHAEL PITT
This guy is ram packed full of talent, and incredibly good looks. I fell in love with him watching cult indie fav Hedwig and the Angry Inch, and thought this guy is crazy fucking hot. He has a type of calm deep voice, angel blonde hair, and lips that’d make cherub’s weep. I’m telling you this guy hits my radar in all the right places. I was so excited when he did something a lil more mainstream and on the reg, Boardwalk Empire. Even though I’m deeply saddened that he was killed off after two seasons, at least I got to see him play the sexy Jimmy Darmody. That quote in the pic above was talking about when he decided to be in Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Of course, I career stalked him. He did a lot indie movies and he was amazing in Last Days. I’m def wishing he was a reg installment on my fall Sunday nights, but we can’t have what we wish for, especially if you’re me. So, reruns will have to tide me over with this hottie.
13. CHRIS HEMSWORTH
This is one really fucking hot Australian. My goodness is he so fucking gorgeous!!!! I had failed to see Thor in theaters but one day, Netflix had made it instant and I was like sure lemme watch because he’s going to be in The Avengers and I sure as fuck was going to see that. My goodness, why did no one with a remote pulse ever tell me to watch this movie???!!!! He is so beautiful and blonde and full of rock hard muscles that would make any smart woman make an unintelligent noise. He is totally believable as this Norse God. He such a great booming laugh and love that scene when he smashes his china on the floor of the diner because he wanted more coffee. He has that smile that melts your heart. All those time people talk about smiles and the affect they have on you, well my goodness he is the king of those smiles. Every time he smiled that big beautiful smile, I swear I heard angel’s sing. That smile could make me do everything and anything. I love his hair long and I love it even more when he puts it back in that half bun thing, Idk why but that makes him even hotter to me. I loove looove love it!!!!!!!!! Also, his laugh his amazing along with accent. Goodness, is that not helping things in that if he were sent to kill me I would just say, yes please. I’m half way melted in that drool puddle I was talking about, time to move on. And funnily enough, I don’t find his lil bro attractive at all.
14. ARMIE HAMMER
I fell in love with this guy on the show Reaper. I loved him as the Devil’s son and I could totally believe it. I was first attracted to his smile, which is amazing, and he has these teeth that poke out his smile and kinda hang on his lip like little fangs, and Idk why I notice that but I looove that about his smile. Makes me think like he has a little demon blood in him and he just is sooo sexy to me. And I’m in love with his voice, second thing that got me and totally sealed the deal. He has a really deep type of rumbling, rolling voice that signals something very deep inside and Idk it just drives me fucking nuts. I regret to not have seen the Lone Ranger in theaters but can’t wait to see him, at home, on my laptop, fuuullllll of privacy lol. I just want him to say something in my ear, bite me, laugh and let it go on from there. Steal my heart in a hot minute….*sigh*
15. CHARLIE HUNNAM
If anyone could steal my breath away and sell it back to me, it’s this guy. He is just so beautiful and blonde. I love his hair long or short, his muscles are insane, and that v cut………. Good Lord he is so sexy and beautiful and he’s English so omg more and more treats for us! I fell in love with him while randomly flipping channels and landed on Nicholas Nickleby. Sure I had no clue what was going on, seeing as it was half way over but there was no way in hell I was flipping the channel again. I found my heart’s heart right there and then and of course, career stalked. He has come a long way since Undeclared, career wise and hunk wise. Sure he started of a little lean and scrawny and now basically a campaign for men to haul there asses to gym. I pretty much only watched Sons of Anarchy because of him. As soon as I found out he was in it, I was like let’s go!!! Good choice in that besides the show being really fucking awesome, you get to Charlie’s ass once or twice and man is every the thing to wish you had. Man he’s beautiful! And to all the Christian Grey, 50 Shades of Grey haters, they obviously don’t know this man. I never read the books but I’m not ignorant as to what goes on on those pages and decided to wait for the movie because whatever hottie was to be lead was worth watching naked and doing some s&m shit. Which I’m totally into. So these bitches that are mad that he’s been chosen, obviously haven’t done their homework. Well here ya go, happy now? I’m sure fucking am and can’t wait to see this man down to his all together. Yummmmmmmmmm……..
16. RYAN GOSLING
My favorite baby goose. Man am I ever in love with this one. So in love, that one of my guy friends is always telling me I hope you find your Ryan Gosling in life. This guy could do, possibly, anything he wants when it comes to me. And I bet most other woman. I know he was their first choice for Christian Grey but I totally understand and completely respect his decision. I ain’t mad, not when Charlie Hunnam’s replacing him, no sir. I always heard of this guy and how great an actor he was and blah blah but never seen him or anything he was in. I’m weird and I don’t like doing what other people do or following them, and if everyone is into someone I try not to intentionally be into him. But this guy popped up on me and it was loove looove loooooove. Thank you IFC channel! I was watching the movie Stay, which has Ewan McGregor, and Naomi Watts. I’m in love with Ewan so that’s why I watched and then I just totally fell in love with Ryan’s character. Of course I IMDb’d it, found out it was him and totally career stalked. I love him and totally fell harder for him in Lars and the Real Girl, he was perfect in Crazy Stupid Love, loved him in Gangster Squad, broke my heart with sadness in Blue Valentine, set my engines alight in Drive, and made me want to be in politics in Ides of March (I don’t blame you Evan Rachel Wood, between him and Clooney *bites knuckle*). Just to name a few of the things you should see him in. But you should career stalk him, like I do. With everyone. But trust me, a Ryan Gosling marathon will set you right. Then you would understand when I talk about his presence, that smile, how endearingly heartbreakingly sweet he can be, how perfect his body is, how you just want to run your fingers through that blonde hair, how he doesn’t have to say anything and you understand everything, and how every single character he plays, you can see he plays with full heart. There is no reason not to love this guy and I’m so team Eva Mendez. I love Rachel but, come on? No contest.
17. HENRY CAVILL
Yummmmmmm, so daamn yummmmy. I love this dude ever since the Tudors. God and that English accent kills me every time. I especially love his voice, it’s amazing and it’s almost lyrical. I love his sexy ass all over that show. I went to see Immortals with a friend and I had no clue he was in the movie, never really heard much about the movie to begin with, but that’s one of the best surprises I’ve ever gotten. So fine, fine as hell. My friend’s like, you need to calm down. And then Superman….Oh God, Superman…… What can I say? I don’t think I’ve ever been so fascinated with a man’s chest so much. I just wanna touch them… and stuff. His body is so fucking sick I can’t take it. Cheekbones for days, beautiful eyes, great hair, his American accent is awesome. If you were a witch and casted a spell for the perfect man, this is what’s you get, at least hope to get. And him and that Superman suit, that’s one I’d love to rip off.
18. DAVID BECKHAM
All I can say is Victoria, you are one lucky bitch and I never been more jealous. She must feel sooo good to go home to alla that. Omg he just keeps getting hotter and hotter and hotter and hotter and hotter and hotter. Loooooooooooove you so much! And I’m so happy that he has this underwear thing with H&M because those sexy ass ads with him being half naked most of the time, is a treat every time. I love when they show up on my news feed when I’m just aimlessly scrolling on Facebook. Looooove. I don’t really need to say much because anyone with a remote pulse should be able to see what a mother fuckin hottie this guy is. Hooooooooooot. I certainly had a lotta fun looking up his picks, and there’s no shortage of him with his shirt off being that he plays soccer and all. Man oh man oh man oh man. Love it! He is totally Beckmmmmm.
19. JOHN HAMM
Oh, John Hamm. He is as refreshing as those Old Fashions his character loves so much on Mad Men. You don’t have to love Mad Men to love John, but it helps. He pretty much makes the show. I love him on that show so much and his character, flaws and all. I think I would have a hard time kicking Don outta bed as well so I don’t blame those women so much. I love his voice, low steady and has a nice rumble to it. Just what you wanna hear when you wake up in the morning and he whispers in your ear, How’d ya sleep? Enough to pull him straight on top of ya, screw morning breath. Love ya John Hamm how do I love ya. Also all those sightings of little John, makes me even happier. 😀 I would love to get my arms around that nice solid chest of his. *sigh*
20. JOHNNY DEPP
The icing on the cake, the cherry on top, breaking hearts since Cry Baby and 21 Jump Street. The major loves of all our hearts, Mr. Johnny Depp. Yummmm. No matter how strange his accent gets, how long the hair, the crazier the roles, if he crawled into our beds one night, we wouldn’t even bat a lash. Def a repeat offender of many dreams. He gets hotter and hotter, when does it ever end?! I hope never!!! Just as his talent is infinite and you can appreciate everything he does, and you just love him even more for being so crazily amazing. If you were ever to be alone on a deserted island, this the man you’d want to be alone with. *sigh* I don’t even wanna think about that right now or this post will never get finished! It’s already been difficult enough. You know him, you love him, and he will forever be breaking hearts.
All these guys have such amazing talents and that’s the reason we fall in love with them in the first place. They enter our hearts through their amazing acting skills with the abilities to make us laugh, cry, think, feel better about ourselves, love, and over all just help us make it through the day. And others we just like to see them take off their shirts and kick around a soccer ball. But no matter what they do, they’re amazing and we love them. If any of these guys ever kidnapped me, the first thing I’d ask for is Stockholm syndrome please. Not that you’d ever need it if your kidnappers look half as amazing as these guys. So keep it up men! We love ya!
Oh, yeah, and you’re welcome. *Sadie voice*