Close Your Eyes- Chemical Brothers

As you know I’ve been a depressive sour puss lately, but a lot of things have happened to make me not fall into the never-ending dark tunnel. A lot of support from my friends which I guess I never really had before. I can get in my own head a lot, and I know a break down is coming soon. Instead of being judged or making me to feel crazy, I received a lot of understanding. I really appreciate everyone holding my hand and not letting go.

Just listening to my music and rediscovered this song. I love Chemical Brothers, and this just explained everything I am going through.

Nicki, Nicki, Nicki

By now everyone has seen the talked about new Nicki Minaj video, Anaconda. Nicki is one of the artist to me that I don’t really obsess over, but I do like a few of her songs. I know some people obsess over Nicki and love everything she does. I’m just chill, like me and her could totally hang. I do like her style and some of the things she does, especially now. I think she has been looking amazing lately.

Anyway, I have been following her new releases a little bit, but I have to say I had to go watch Anaconda. From all the videos and pics she has been posting on instagram, it was a must see. And I must say, she doesn’t disappoint. Here’s just a few reasons why I love Nicki and her ratchet ass new song:

1- Nicki looks flawless, I mean absolutely amazing. I know it’s all Photoshop and TV magic, and she looks good all the time, but idk. To me, in this video, she looks absolutely amazing, totally perfect. Nicki was on her game in this video.

2- Let’s not pussy foot around, I mean come on, the amazing amounts of booties that are just in this video. Booties on land, booties in the sea, booties booties booties, just for you and me. LOL I totally just made that up…. at least I think I did.

3- All the twerking! Nicki has def stepped her booty game up, and she can swing that thing, and slam it on the floor. I ain’t mad at ya Nicki!

4- I love when she’s giving Drake a lap dance and all he could do is sit there like DAYUUMM. And when she was backing it up on her knees, I was like okaaayy Nicki, go head!

5- My favorite scene is when she’s doing her cute little work out and stuff Idk why. Pink is not my fav color, but that is for sure Nicki’s.

6- Idk why, I really don’t but my fav line: He tossed my salad like his name is romaine.

7- Nicki herself says, she on her dumb shit. And I love it!!!

8- Fuck the skinny bitches!!! That’s right Nicki, you tell them!! Fuck them skinny bitches, make way for us big booty bitches! I’m just big all around but it’s all good. 😉

I know there’s a bunch of people hating on Nicki Minaj right now and saying she’s a slut, she’s being too ratchet, and she’s being inappropriate and not being a role model…. Here’s my rant on Nicki: Nicki never started, never claimed, and never will be an appropriate role model for your children. She did not just come out yesterday. That’s how she got her start, she was always controversial, no holding back about anything, especially her body and sexuality. Just because she came out with a few pop songs does not make her 100% appropriate. And if you’re children are looking up to Nicki as a role model, and you’re not talking to them about why she’s not appropriate for their age group, then you have a problem. People rely too heavily on society to raise their kids when they should. This is a part of being a parent. Nicki never came out claiming to be that.

And to those that claim she’s a slut and all that, WHO CARES? I really don’t. She’s not my friend, and guess what? She’s making more money than all of us combined! I cannot hate on her hussle and what she does with her body is her business. I think it’s great to have a female rapper of today to talk about her sexuality without apologies. Many have done it before her of course, and I think in this day and age where double standards still provail, I appalaud her for saying what she wants, what she likes to do and not giving a fuck. We are not perfect, I don’t expect her to be, but I do apprecaite the rawness which I think women should be allowed to have. If you know me really well, when it comes to talking about sex I have no problem talking about, no holding back. Most guys can’t handle that and it’s really sad. They can talk about bitches sucking their dick all day, but we say we like getting eaten out and they just can’t handle it. So I’m all for Nicki and her ratchet ass song. Go head girl!!

Lana’s New Video Out Today: Ultraviolence

Hey there darlings! Lana’s new video is out todaaaay!! Hooray! After seeing all the stills for Ultraviolence posted all over her Instagram, the video has finally dropped today. And she does not disappoint. The queen of Hollywood sadcore, is at her height of sexual broodiness on the most important day of every woman’s life, her wedding day. Giving a glimpse to all the diehard Del Rey fans of what it would be like to marry their one and only bae.

The video looks great, her tramping through the woods with a lace veil to die for. Staying with same grainy film of her videos and staying true to her music video splicing roots. The only thing you’ll be wishing for is to be there yourself. Enjoy kiddies! 😉



So I had the new cd from Lana Del Rey, Ultraviolence, for some time now. It was so hard for me to really really get into and super love. I have my few songs that I love but I just felt it was sooo very slow with no pick up at all. Just put me to sleep, Lana. But it’s totally what I expect from her, and with one of my favorite songs like Yayo, I was hoping she would take this route. Be careful what you wish for. But I totally understand where she is going with this, seeing as I was hoping she would. A very jazzy, bluesy, old worldy, very retro sound but totally relevant. I definitely get images in my head and I can totally see some stories I could write from this album. But I feel I just can’t get into every single song. I have my favorites and I’ll stick to those, but other ones…. I think I need a break. I have nothing but love for my girl, don’t get it twisted one bit. I love her, and I understand 100% what she where she was going with this album, but I gotta be real with myself. Half the album made me wanna go to sleep. But sometimes I just need a break from my bands because I wear them out and I get to where I can’t stand them. I’m trying with her, I really am, but I’m not forcing it. I’m sticking to my favorites. I hope you loved this album and gave it half a chance.

Also I think it is also because so many people have grown to love her and obsess over her outta no where. Before it was just me by myself carrying the flag for this girl, and now I can barely get around all the other super fans to see the finish line. They better not fucking ruin Lana for me. I love this bitch before any of the rest on them. She is forever one of the greatest influences on certain aspects of my life. But mostly I love her strength to carry on even though all the haters tried to drag her down, and she went with her head held high and gave no fucks about it. She continues being herself, offering no answers, only results. You can be successful in whatever you want if you really really really try and fuck all those people that try to bring you down in the process. All that matters is you, and that you feel happy with yourself.


if you’re not drinking, then you’re not playing:

cool heart, cool hands, and aptitude:

watch what you say to me:

drink a cherry cola lime (one of the many ways me and Lana are besties! she always knows my fav drinks. i love making cherry lime coke at the freestyle machines. bae you know all my favorites :D):

I could’ve died right then:

you’re burning up, I’m cooling down:

This is the only time I ever ordered her songs into what I like the most, going down. I usually love all her songs but these are my favs from this album. Another reason why I maybe straying from the other songs is that I’m already a depressed, sad person, I really don’t wanna hear anything even more sad and mellow sounding. I just don’t have the emotional stamina. Maybe when I’m a little happier, I can appreciate the deep blues of this album. And it is also very fantasy rock and roll lifestyle to me, with certain songs. At least ones I want to write about. But those are my fav songs off this album. And of course, can’t wait for more.




Happy Anniversary to Me!

Can you believe it? It’s been a whole year since I’ve been torturing you people with my rinky dink blog and I’ve received over 2000 views! Only took a whole bloody year to do it. Blog posts full of self loathing, depression, Lana del Rey, broken pieces of stories, and food… I say it’s been a neurotic trip in the very least. But the one thing that has kept this crazy trip going, is my need for writing and getting something out there when the depression filled skies become clear, and Lana del Rey. Especially now that my bae has become ever so fuckin popular and everyone and their god damn grandmother has seen her but me. Me and boy Richie are up in arms about this and just wanna see our favorite hoe up on stage. He has never been to a concert before and from what I have seen of Lana’s concert, it’s like an outta body experience. He thinks he’s going to pass out and wake up and it’ll all be over. Probably. And I’ll piss, shit, and cum in my fuckin shorts, and we’ll both probably be dragged out by security from trying to sneak onto her tour bus.

But let’s just give the people what they want: Lana! Also I just wanna give tribute to this amazing lady for not knowingly keeping my blog ever so alive. So here ya go, more of Ms. D. Rey:


you turned me on and brought color into my life:


i’m alive again:


i’m the sweetest girl in town so why are so mean:

lana del rey flowers in hair

you could be kissing my fruit punch lips:

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the boys, the girls, they all like carmen:



my eyes are wide like cherry pies:


let me put on a show for you daddy:

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finally you and me are the lucky ones, this time:


That’s just random mix of Lana del Rey’s songs to tide you over til Ultraviolence comes out. Can’t fuckin wait!!!!

As always, love you more than those bitches before…..

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Ladies and Gents!

Now presenting the mini film we’ve all been waiting for… TROPICO!!!!! Yes, yes Tropico is finally here! A mini film featuring Lana Del Rey and Shaun Ross. This mini film features videos for three of her songs off her Paradise EP: Body Electric, Gods and Monsters, and Bel Air. I’m not going to pretend and say that I know everything that’s going on the film because I def don’t. As my good friend Richie says, you def need to be high for some of this shit. Sure I understand it on it’s most basic level, being in the garden of Eden, falling from grace, now shoot to life as we know it now, full of sin and bad decisions, and then what we all want: a way out and being able to enjoy the beauty of life. But ask me anything further than that and you’re asking my brain to hurt. So without further ado, you know what to do:


Still not sure that you want any part of this mind bend experience? Here’s a few reasons why you should watch my favorite underdog:

Top 10 Reasons to Watch Tropico:

1. Hellooo!!! Lana’s in it!!! Duh…

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2. The strip club scene provides us with some very bootyliscious strippers… make that ass clap!

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3. Lana stripping, thought I really wish she was wearing pasties like everyone else…

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4. Lana’s rose outfit in the garden of Eden, looove it!

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5. A garden of Eden filled with Marilyn Monroe, Elvis, John Wayne, and of course Jesus Christ.

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6. Lana running around town with some badass chicks.

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7. Lana is your narrator that guides you throughout the film, reciting Allen Ginsberg and Walt Whitman.

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8. Clips of some pretty cray party scenes that make you wish you were high so maybe you knew remotely what was going on.

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9. Robbing mitches and taking all their money.

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10. It’s all we have until her new album Ultraviolence comes out sometimes next year!! 😥

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So thanks a lot asshole who stole all her music and pre-released them. Now she has to start from scratch and that means we have to wait until the New Year to see what her new shit’s all about. But I already like the title. I have a penchant for violence and if it’s ultra, even better.

You’ve done it again Ms. D. Rey and I certainly look forward to viewing more of your work. Were you not entertained?!

Love you more, than those bitches before…

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A Scene In a Movie

Yesterday I got super depressed because I bought tickets to go to Fright Fest and then my cousin forgot to tell me she got into a car accident and can’t go. She’s fine just the car is hurt. I tried to go with my friend Richie but they were only taking one car with 6 people in it. Idk what kind of clown car business that is. And then later my cousin texted me to say that the people who we were going with also got into a car accident so their not going either. I was like wtf? That’s too crazy. Maybe we’re just not meant to go this weekend. But I was pissed cuz the tickets are $54 and I just spent a pretty penny and I haven’t been getting more than 25 hours at work. I really need to buy hair dye and stuff cuz I look like shit. Anyway, she’s just like seeing as you can’t return the ticket, we just have to go another day. Thank God because I was ready to slit my wrists open all over the place. I was sooo excited to go, I never been to Fright Fest and it’s my dream to get frightened and then accidentally punch someone in the face outta fear. I already got my outfit together!!! Anyway, maybe I can still buy my hair dye, whatever.

But I was putting this song on blast through my beat up purple Urbanears headphones, and it makes everything ya do seem like you’re going in slow motion in you’re depressing movie life.

well you were high when i meant you:


This is one band you should really get into. They’re bloody awesome. I played this over and over yesterday. Really helped comfort me and it makes me wanna dance! Or just walk miserably through the streets and open doors.